call it what you want, but i call it how i feel.

if you never love, you’ll never learn.

if you never learn, you’ll never love.

yeah, that makes sense.
when you love- you learn what that word really means; how much it hurts, what it costs, why you do things, how it affects everything & what you’re willing to do. after that… you can love, again, and know that you now know what it truly is.

I think I’ve said this a million times.

there is nothing that we will ever do that is longer than life. I mean really. nothing is as long as our lives. yet, we always say life is too short. it really is though, there is so much to do & see in the world. time is not long enough. how can we possible explore all there is & still live the life that is expected. we cannot simply drop everything & go see the world. how will we eat, reproduce, maintain a lifestyle? we just can’t. I don’t understand. is there anyone out there that knows what I mean? anyone?

how strange

it is to have a heart that’s broken, but also whole.

& what it all comes down to.

slight schizophrenia.
I can’t shake off this feeing, it’s destroying everything I know.

darkness after light.

dear cusca,

words can’t even explain the emptiness I feel in my heart. it feels like a big chunk of me is missing, I loved you more than anything in the world. it’s hard to think I’m never gonna see your beautiful little face again. no one is gonna wait for me to get home, lay with me & keep me company. :’( I’ve cried so much, I don’t think I can cry anymore. you were the best dog that I think anyone could ever ask for. oh baby, I miss you so much already. I never thought this day would come so soon. just the day before, we were driving around. I always thought you’d make it to my wedding day, I literally saw it in my mind. you’ll never know how sorry I am that I missed your last hours. I’ve been so busy with everything else that I hardly gave you the attention you deserved, I’m so sorry. my heart aches to the core every single time I think about it. I didn’t even get to say good bye, I took you for granted- I was so sure I’d see you later on that night. please forgive me. I’m glad mom, dad, Jojo & Lucy were with you since I couldn’t be. I swear, I’ve never hated my job so much. I know you were trying your best to wait for me to get home. I hope you felt me lay down with you… even if you were “already gone” by then. I know in my heart that you did, a love like ours had no boundaries. good bye best friend, old companion. rest in peace, and remember to find me when it’s my time. I want you to welcome me to heaven and show me the way to eternal happiness. I love you.

forever yours,
angie.

prom.

not mine, my sister’s junior one.

I’m still tired as fuck though, I feel as if I haven’t slept. honestly, I don’t think I have. & I’ve been running around with this one. thank god. too much. hahah.

on a excellent note, I’m taking better beauty care of myself. :) baby steps.